Jack the Giant Slayer - Poem


Fee-fi-fo-fum.

Ask not whence the thunder comes.

Ask not where the herds have gone.

Nor why the birds have ceased their song.

When coming home, don't take too long.

For monsters roam in Albion.


"With seeds they pulled

from a magical pod...

"... the monks grew a pathway

to seek out their God.

"When they came

to what they thought...

"... was heaven's gate...

"... they met with a terrible, grisly fate.

"For between heaven and earth was a...

"... perilous place.

"Gantua, home to a fierce giant race.

"With a bridge now before them

to the world of men...

"... a plague of giants descends.

"Taking a cue from the richest of kings...

"... they acquired a taste...

"... for acquiring things.

"But the one taste that caused them

to lose all control..."

"Was a taste for mankind...

"... blood, bones and all."


"King Erik...

"... bade the monks return to dark arts...

"... to find some way...

"... to rule giant hearts.

"So they melted one down...

"... mixed in magic and more...

"... and they crafted a crown

unlike any before."


"As soon as the king

took the crown in hand...

"... the giants were slaves...

"... to his every command.

"He sent them back

to the place of their birth.

"Their home now a prison

between heaven and earth.

"Erik severed the link...

"... between giants and men."

"And peace returned

to his kingdom again.

"The mystical relics...

"... were all that remained...

"... safe with Erik through the years

that he reigned.

"And when time came at last

for King Erik to sleep...

"... he took crown

and seed with him...

"... for permanent keep."

"And as the king's bones

slowly crumbled away...

"... truth became legend."

Or so people say.


"And jealous eyes are looking down...

"... on peaceful fields in Albion.

"An enemy vows will come a day...

"... when giants return and giants stay.

"To wage a war...

"... and this time win...

"And to eat the last...

"... of Erik's kin."